Cruel Summer continues

1984 - a tumultuous year. The Miner's Strike, the problems in Lebanon and the peak of Bananarama. They had a huge hit with 'Cruel Summer' that year, and this seems to be the theme for the Vets Summer League campaign. It has been a long hot few months, and the venerable citizens of the Sils have found it hard going. (Vote Leave)

It started well. The Vets warm-up these days is Toblerone doing some laps of the pitch, and the rest of the team attempting to kill the goalkeeper. Marvellous. Cap'n Gary assembled the pensioners and insisted we start fast. Of course - this is all relative, and the youthful appearance of the opposition did not bode well. (Vote Leave)
We actually did okay for 15 minutes. The defence was solid and Christ was like a rock. The Child Catcher was also on fire - and it was a pleasure to see the headband back in action. Berkswell were probing like a trainee proctologist, and eventually they overloaded our players and slipped one in - 1-0. This led to sustained pressure on our goal, and we seemed to be like a personal shopper at Harrods. "Oh hello Berkswell - come on in. Browse, take your time. Can't see what you want? Don't worry - you have plenty of time" Three more times in the first half they scored. It was all a bit deja vu really. It was really deja vu (I see what you did there - Ed).
So half time - the question was - what is going wrong in defence. This was a bit like saying to Captain EJ Smith on the bridge of the Titanic "I am afraid you have hit an iceberg - but you have run out of towels in the gym". The whole team was struggling to cope. There was a decision to play a new system (Surrender?- Ed), and we returned to the good old Mike Bassett 4-4-2. Would this lead to improvement?

In a word - yes (Vote Remain). The Sils always play a good second half, and with Tog 8 holding the line, and Tambourine providing some menace from midfield, we looked much more even. 50 Shades and Tenacious D put in a good shift up front, and Right Said Fred avoided trying to kill the opponents this week. Tangerine set up Right Said Fred to score a tap in, and we came close on many occasions. However, we were still vulnerable at the back, and Berkswell created many chances - scoring 2 of them. (Vote Leave).

In the end it was 6-1. The game itself is good, but we do not make things easy for ourselves. The ball is given away like haribo at a children's party, and sometimes this causes us to have to run too much. The result - wheezing 40+ hockey players running round like Roland Browning and not being able to keep up. However, the team spirit is good, and we all retired to the bar for pies and chat. The MoM vote was close - but it was deservedly won by Turkmenistan, and with several votes going to Cap'n Gary and Christ. The referendum vote was less clos with 66% voting to Remain. This was encouraging as otherwise the pies would not have been eaten.

The whole sorry roadshow reassembles next week to play Warwick (who have renamed themselves like an episode of Countdown for some reason). Will the Cruel Summer continue? Or will it be an improvement? It's all excitement in the Vets.