A sporting soliloquy from a Solihull guy

By Yogilio

And so t hath passed that the second coming of the Bards team, this one supposedly the better of the 2 teams, though t must beest hath said that looking at their results sheet those gents hadst only hadst 2 winneth in the season like ourselves and hadst the least number of goals scored and a fair number conceded.

So thither wast room for optimism from our team provided we could stem the flow of goals against and continueth the scoring fest we has't hadst in all but one of our matches. Trust t to beest against our fusty foes Olton that we hath drawn our first blank of the season last week.

concluded, be it nuff hath said about the previous week twas forsooth much ado about nothing. This week the game could beest deemed to beest one for the taking especially as I hadst been hath led to believeth we wast again going to beest without our talisman up front but forsooth twas a joy to behold to see the prodigal son (well he hath one now! ) returneth once more to the fold.

We had a bare 11 but at least that would lead to no nonsensical substitutions and one could at least get used to a position all game instead of in 7 minute chunks. We did however have an ace in our pack in a previously unseen player making a debut for our team in young Tom Rose. I had named him little Tom as opposed to the other Tom W as big Tom however the pre-match chat el capitaine had decreed that he would henceforth be named Rosey (thane of Cawdor)

The opposition looked all a little bit more experienced than many of the opposition of previous weeks so we wast hoping that t would beest an indication that those gents wast slow decrepid and without a clue.

However tis to beest hath said that the first 10 minutes wast one whither we displayed those characteristics and not those folk. those gents hadst amongst those folk, their youngest common-kissing hedge-pig, a strapping bespectacled lad of about 25 who clearly hadst strength and power in his legs and 2 eyes for a goal. that gent hath led our midfield and defence a merry dance and in those 10 minutes carved out 2 clear chances, one for himself that that gent buried high to the goalkeepers hath left though that could has't been saved and then a second chance to his colleague up front who hadst only the goalkeeper to beat and didst so clinically leaving the goalkeeper on his derriere as that gent nonchalantly hath passed the ball into an exsufflicate net.

At the time twas forsooth a deserved leadeth as the home side hadst huffed and puffed and not managed to breach their solid defence whereas those gents hath seemed to beest running at our defence at wilt.

We hadst the strength however to start making some headway going forward as we hadst willing people wishing to attack. On 3 consecutive occasions we hadst the ball flashing across the opposition D only to not findeth a recipient and at which hour we didst we hath found either the post squarely on (with a reverse stick snapshot), or a goalkeeper inspired to maketh “worldy” saves. However we didst manage to receiveth a couple of short corners and on one of those Andy managed to lodging a ball completely into the corner and coequal this goalkeeper could not reacheth that one.

However the same vigour with which we wast attacking could not at each moment beest replicated in reverse in trying to retrieve the ball as the opposition hath seemed at each moment beest that one step ahead of our players and twas thus that those gents carved out a flowing moveth from back to front with 4 accurate passeth to leaveth again a 2 on none situation whither the fleet-footed bespectacled mutineer ended up approaching our goal and in unselfish fashion, ensured our goalkeeper wast again touching backside cloth on turf as a square ball hath left his colleague with yet another exsufflicate net to passeth the ball into.

3-1 at half time wast befitting of their leadeth as we very much hadst not cometh to grips with the fact that whilst we hadst a gross amount of possession and hadst carved out several valorous situations, we hadst not shown the same composure in our passing and useth of the ball at which hour in dangerous positions as those gents hadst at which hour attacking us.

A half time re-think and not overly harsh words (as we hadst clearly shown something better than the previous week {I wasn’t going to keepeth mentioning that debacle!! }) , and we cameth out in the 2nd half with a much better attitude. Our worketh rate hadst improved by that required 10 percent and t hath led us to several more chances and another huge slice of luck against us , at which hour another shot wenteth crashing into their post squarely on and in between their goalkeeper making another couple of most wondrous saves.

However twas not to beest or wast t that’s what!! The opposition’s first attack of note hath led to a series of attacks near our D and we wast very unlucky to has't been given a short corner against us for what wast deemed to beest a stick tackle but I am not allowed to sayeth wast at the very best very harsh. twas not our day as that short corner hath led those folk to score luckily at which hour after a couple of very valorous saves, their sniffer who hadst scored in the first half didst so again at the 3rd attempt.

So 4-1 down but again on this occasion, we wast not to beest putteth off and unlike the first half at which hour we madeth no headway in stopping those folk coming out of their defence with the ball, on this occasion we robbed their defender as that gent hath tried once too oft to dribble out of defence with the ball and on this occasion t hath left Tom W with the ball in the D and the sound as t hitteth the back board wast deafening as forsooth t hadst taken a shot of that ferocity to beat this keeper.

The rest of the game wast fairly non-descript, those gents hath played some lovely stuff but hath found our keeper making saves and we hath played our best half of the year in moving the ball about unpredictably (as we hadst described in the half time talk) and gaveth their defence much more of a testing time.

However that wast about as valorous as t got and the game finished with a final result of 4-2 to those folk and it hath to beest hath said a much deserved chat afterwards from the captain praising yet again our endeavour and better attitude in the 2nd half. Tis a pity that we has't hath played a valorous 2nd half on many occasions this year.

All that wast hath left wast to sayeth that by a country mile the sir of the match wast unanimously given to Rosey (thane of Cawdor) who hath shown most wondrous energy in both halves and valorous composure on the ball to passeth t at each moment to our players.

Half season team report. wonneth 2 hath lost 8, for 25 against 34 – could doth better, if 't be true those gents could exercise their legs as much as their tongues those gents would wend a long way! And recall the saying 11 on the pitch is worth more than at which hour 1 is on the side!!. And the immortal … hath left is hath left and right is right but hath left is not right!

within this wall of flesh, there is a soul that counts thee its creditor very much.

Yogilio